Good days and Not so good days

Its funny how we have good days and not so good days..... some days I am so content, so excited, so at peace, other day I am freaking out, complaining, etc.

Why?

Life I guess, but I am coming to realize that it doesnt have to be like that, it is all about how we let our mind and the negative thoughts run and get bigger, until our perspective is blown out of proportion!!

So Sunday we went to church and I had a vision during worship of A person standing under a large stick or piece of plywood. The person was just dried up, wilting, feeling overwelmed and wondering what happened to God, did he leave ? Then I saw water/rain falling but because the wood was so thick it wasnt getting through to the person underneath the wood. Then I saw God snap the wood into two and the water gushed over the person, giving them life, soaking them....

So I shared this vision to the church, then when I sat down I realized that the vision was for me and that I was dried up and wilting. So I stood up and sureenderd everything to the Lord.... realized I havent been thankful fopr what God has done and has given us. I have just complained and been so negative,,,looking at what I dont have rather then what I do have. I asked God to forgive me for my complaints .... I surrendered everything to God.

Now the funny part is after worship the Pastor got up and what did he start talking about......being thankful!!! Do you think God was trying to get my attention?!!!!!

So Monday I woke up...it was so nice not to have to rush the kids off to school!!
I sat down and just thanked God for everything, even our debt.....and placing everything work, debt, family etc into his hands!!

That afternoon, we got a call for our first home inspection with JDS. It was such an encouraging blessing...and I am so thankful to God for that as well as knowing that HE takes care of us.

Thank you Lord for all that you are, all the you do, fo ryour love, your grace, your mercy,
This Easter I thank you for dieing for me. For rising again after 3 days to give us a freedom we will never be fully able to understand. Thank you for your freedom!

I love you Lord!!


Be Blessed today
and I wish you a very Happy Thankful Easter!!

What the hell.....

Sometimes I just want to say...What the hell are we doing?

What is uncondtional Love?

This is a question I have really been thinking about lately. What is unconditional Love? What does it mean to you? Have you ever been unconditionally loved? What does that look like?
One example of unconditional love.... is a mother who is devestated that their son is in jail for being accused of sexually abusing their daughter, the mother is devestated by the act, but loves her son no matter what, because she believes in him, she trust God with him, she doesn,t give up hope.

Another example is a man whose ex girlfriend gets pregnant with another person's baby, but yet loves her so much he marries her and raises and loves the baby as his own.

Another example is when I was drunk, sleeping around, alienated myself from God and Christians, yet a christian friend comes and hangs out, loves me for where I am, joins me in my messiness, not judging, but loving...saying I don't agree with your lifestyle, but I Love you... I believe in you.

I have had the honor to see so many people I know walk in unconditional love and forgiveness....

The greatest example is Jesus.....he loves us so much he died a horrific death so that we can be free, he clothes us with a holy mantle and he sees us perfect in our messiness and brokenness... he loves us so much, he forgives us 70X7, He believes in us...He might not agree with the choices we are making, we might even break his heart, but one thing that is for sure is He never gives up on us, He loves us unconditionally, even more then we can fathom...it mind blowing to dwell in that kind of love.

Do we love unconditionally? Most of love ...but we have either unspoken or spoken expectations.... we have conditions...I love you , but....
I love you , but you have to do this, or be like this. We put up conditions sometimes without knowing it, sometimes we do it cuz we dont know any better.

This is when we need a revelation of how much God loves us...exactly where we are..in our brokenness, in our mess.

God reveal to us how much you love us..... for with out your revelation we will never be able to love as you love us.

Were would we be with out that love? If we dont know God's love, if we dont believe that he Loves us....then wow how miserable would our lives be...there would be no hope.

Unconditional love is a the foundation the basis to our relationship and walk with God

I pray that if you do not truly believe that God loves you exactly as you are, broken, bruised, a mess, I pray you find the reality soon....

When we know some one loves us unconditionally, it not only gives us hope, it gives us a sence of belonging...which is what we all desire.... to be loved and accepted!! With no expectations, no conditions...just as we are.

We were at a youth conference last weekend and the speaker was talking about the Good Samaritan and how the man was broken, covered in dirty blood, a mess.
And the first 2 guys who walked around the dirty broken man....they had their own reasons why they couldn't get dirty...whether it was because they didn't know what to do, or maybe they felt that if they got to close they would be contaminated, perhaps they were so caught up in what they thought was a good religious lifestyle they forgot about being human.

Whatever the reason they never stopped to help, to love, to show God's unconditional love and grace.
Then came the Good Samaritan he stop got down to the broke man's level, he got blood on his hands, he got dirty, he carried the broken man to safety, he did what it took to love unconditionally...he never condemned the man for being broken, but he loved the man in his brokenness!

My desire is to be the Good Samaritan, to reach out and show God's love and Grace for where people are at.

God has shown me unconditional love, I have caught a small glimpse of it and I want to show it to others to all I come into contact with.... I will not judge, I will not condemn, I will love as Jesus loves, I will forgive as Jesus forgives, I will be Jesus with arms and flesh and then HE can flow through me.

This is my life's purpose to love unconditionally as I am loved.

This is my prayer!

Be Blessed!

Life is good!!!

Life is good...I am so blessed by my husband, my children , my home.....

We are loving being here in Westbank! It feels so natural and so at home!! The sun is amazing!
I've started going to the gym..... the first day I worked out for over an hour, and rather then being sore, my body was exhausted! Today I went and just did cardio for 2o minutes. Tomorrow I am going again, but his time I have a friend coming with me. This is the first time I will have a workout partner that is not Trevor. I am excited though and its amazing how much better I feel during the day!
I am still getting use to getting up at 6 am. Its good for me!!
So overall I feel very blessed..we are getting to know people, we are getting paychecks that cover the bills, and we are enjoying the family!!!

The hardest part is church...we just haven't felt like going to church....We've been invited to an evangelical church here in Westbank...I dont know.... Maybe ....

The thing I love the most is that God is still here with us even though we dont go to church. Today all I wanted to do was sing along with Chris Tomlin and it was so wow....

Thank you Lord for taking care of all our needs, for keeping us all safe, and for all that you do for us, for loving us, for your grace, your wisdom...

I really need Gods grace with my children and for wisdom on how to deal with them the best way.

I need you Lord
I love you Lord

Be Blessed!!

homesick..... and freedom

SO the last couple of days I have been feeling homesick...... homesick for our old house, the youth, our friends, the money Trev made.....I have to keep on top of my thoughts and remember that God called us here to Westbank and to stand firm.... We knew when we moved here that financially we would be tight, it just has been a bigger adjustment then I anticipated.

We moved knowing with out a doubt that God said go....though somedays when the storm rages, its a fight to keep my eyes on Jesus. All my preaching to you and myself regarding taking control of my thoughts etc..is having to be really practiced.

Anyhow all this to say..... that I miss my friends.....I miss our old house (not the big one, the one we owned), however I do miss the big bath from the huge house!!! I miss shopping, just because, I miss doing things with out thinking about the cost of $$$.

I have been working on our brochure for inspections and been using the pictures from our renovations... it was so beautiful.....so needless to say I miss it.

Its okay to miss it, to be honest but I just need to rise above it.... so thats where I am..... we really need a miracle with our finances ... Lord I know that where you call you provide. . and I am believing that you are going to set us free.... Father we ask for favor, with inspections.... let it take off Lord..... open the doors , set us free

I love you Lord and I trust you to provide for our every need and desires.
Thank you for taking care of us..... thank you for you protection, your freedom, your grace, and your love!

Thank you for your blessing you have pour out on us, thank you for our house, our cars, our amazing family you have given us... Wow you are amazing!!

Being Thankful is an amazing way to come up higher, to free our minds, to worship the Lord with gladness in the struggles.

Be Blessed!!

relax...

Wow...spring...equals new growth, time to get out of winter ruts and get into new routines and try new things....
The weather outside is so beautiful and sunny, warm...I love not having to wear a big heavy jacket!!

I love watching the snow melt away as I anticipate what our new garden looks like!! If it is anything like the bit of garden I see now..I have alot of work setout for me!!

So my new thing I am trying....is possible a job.....full time.... wow if I get it that will be amazing...and it will be definitely a change.

But untill I get it , which I might not, I am just relaxing, enjoying life... I made bread from scratch, I've gardened (where the snow has melted) I have danced, baked, painted, I ve enjoyed every minute.

So I am also trying to learn to be more positive and encouraging... in every moment..but what a fight with my thoughts to be this way.....my thoughts want to go neagitive but I choose to be positive.

I watched Evan Almighty the other night and one of the things the character God says "if you pray for patience do you think God automatically gives you patience or does he give you th opportunity to have patience"
How true...sometimes we pray and we totally expect a instance answer, like a magic wan di s waved and "poof" we have patience.... wouldn't that save alot of hassele...yet is we dont learn what we ask for then we will take it for granted. So in the movie the mom (wife of Evan) prayed that their family would be closer together. She almost missed the opportunity to do that, to learn to be closer together, to act upon it!

It's like a light went on....it clicked.... what opportunities are we missing that we have asked for?

...I know I am more aware to look for the opportunities and if God does do the magice "poof" it is most likely because I needed it really bad!!!

Be blessed!!

New Lifestyles and such....

Wow with a move so big and so good, has come a new lifestyle change. Its strange, but so good!

My days are less busy, less stressed, and still fun!!
The lastest thing I have started doing in my daily routine is working out.....however not just any working out, but worshiping as well.... I have been dancing for 20 - 30 minutes to worship music...wow I feel so refreshed all day. I work out a sweat....which I have never done before and I love it!!!

The first time I did it I felt really awkward, but then I prayed "Lord free me to dance" and I danced ....it is so fun, so invigorating, and so amazing. I have been so blessed!!

What else is new.....well I am looking for a job....that will defiantly be a change!
This whole move has been one of faith..knowing that God brought us here.....why and what purpose is still unknown, however we know with out a doubt it was the best thing to do.

Knowing this we continue to stand on it saying God you have to provide..... and so far he has...He is so faithful!!

We are loving it here and look forward to what God has in store for us!!